a personal day (literally)

today I did not go to work at First Baptist. last night I celebrated two of my best friend's birthdays, so we stayed out and about late and stayed in a hotel. it was so fun!

I got home around 11:00 this morning. after dropping my dad's car off at the fixer-upper place, we came back home and I saw my bed. my glorious, lovely, welcoming bed. I looked at dad, looked at my bed, and then said..."yeahhh, I'm gonna lay down for a little bit." this time last summer this would be a risky action to take. when I was having harder "down" days I could nap the day away and then not be able to sleep and the whole cycle would start all over again the next day. but today, I laid in bed, watched "Crazy, Stupid Love" and caught up on the social medias.

this time spent by myself (and Monster for a little bit) just made me realize/remember how many introvert tendencies I have. after a night of being out with a large group, talking and meeting new people, my heart and soul was ready for some quiet time. I needed to recharge!

I had an appointment with my therapist later in the afternoon. before I went, I got out of bed and cleaned my room and bathroom. talk about some pre-therapy therapy! I love putting things away, organizing - it gives me the feeling (a fleeting feeling - ha!) that I have a handle of my life.

when you are a survivor of a traumatic experience like rape, the things in life that allow you to have complete control are things that you love. when I have say in what I'm doing, when I'm doing something, and HOW I'm doing something I flourish. life in The After is so strange, but finding moments like today when I found a piece of control that was productive makes me feel less like a crazy person.

of course a trip to the dog park with Monster is always a great end to a good day. the weather was just perfect, there were tons of dogs, and I met a guy! his name is Austin, he's super sweet, funny, and 4 years old :) I got him to take a picture with me (his mom took one of us, too!) but I won't share just for their privacy. we talked about all the different kinds of dogs, the weather, and school - he was quite the charmer!

I hope your Tuesday was a good day. if not? take a deep breath - tomorrow is almost here (it's late!) and that means you get to start fresh. we need that.

I love y'all,
H